I’ll Never Forget (I hope)…

the day I was married; births, marriages, and deaths of family members; past Christmases; vacations, speaking engagements and all the wonderful folks I have met; the Bicentennial (I was the Bicentennial chairperson for Monroe County, Indiana!), etc. Everyone has moments, hours, days that stick in their memories for a long, long time. A psychologist friends of mine calls these crystallized memories.

One of those reoccurring days for me is the day after Thanksgiving. This is the day for the past twenty or more years I put out our Christmas lawn decorations.For me this became a memorable day about eight years ago, the year I was told by a friend wearing a white coat, “Richard you have dementia, probably of the Alzheimer’s type, and certainly with Alzheimer’s features.”

Although I am pretty sure I get the order they occurred, and many of the details mixed up, they are memorial days for me because I can measure my deterorating level of competence in the daily activities of living (other than dressing myself, bathing myself, etc). Do I recall where I stored everything? No! several years ago I simply lost all our extension cords because I couldn’t remember from one year to the next where I Put them. We have been looking for years and haven’t yet found them. Yes we had to buy all new ones!

Can I figure out how to string the lights and hook up the extension chords in the right order? This year I asked my 11 year old Grand Son, Hayden to help me!

Do I have enough self discipline/focus/control of my attention that I can accomplish all the tasks by myself and in one day. This year my Son and Daughter-in-Law stepped in and “helped” me stay on task(s) and get the jobs done.

When I have completed the tasks and plugged everything in, does everything stay lit? This year I plugged the extension chords into the wrong plugs and within thirty minutes blew several fuses. I’m still rearranging plugs and trying to remember how I got it all to work last year.

I know these seem like trivial problems. I know these are problems my family stands ready, willing, and able to enable and support me. I know all this, yet I still feel bad - sorry for my self, I guess. I really hate this disease/process/condition/syndrome!